Work with your child or teen to make plans to address the causes of her impulsivity, and then practice this STOP-THINK-GO strategy successfully used to help children learn how to slow down before acting.
STOP Before Acting!
“Stop!” does not work no matter how many times you say it!
Agree to a “key-word” or phrase you can use to STOP your child.
The funnier the better.
THINK!
Help her ask herself, “Is this going to hurt anyone?” and “Is this going to hurt me?”
Make sure your child understands that “hurt” can include physically hurting someone, hurting someone’s feelings, and hurting (breaking) someone’s things.
GO with the Best Choice!
After the fact, if she made a good choice, she should tell someone and celebrate!
If the didn’t make a good decision, she should ask someone, “How could I make a better choice next time?”
Practice, Plan, and Practice Some More
You will need to practice this process a number of times using real-life situations you and your child identified in my last post. On a weekly basis, it may be helpful to think ahead about any upcoming challenges that could cause your child to become impulsive, then make a plan and practice implementing the plan.
As stated in the first post in this series, it takes time and effort to help your child make this much-needed change.
If you need help motivating your child to take these steps, consider using incentives described in my articles about using token-economy and response-cost behavior management strategies.
Need More Help for Your Child or Teen?
This basic STOP-THINK-GO process is a good place to start, but many children and teens need help learning to use specific strategies for each of the four stages in the Process Model of Self-Control.
Contact us to learn how your child or teen can develop these skills.
(c) 2010-2019, Monte W. Davenport, Ph.D.
