Recently, I asked Michelle, a smart and determined girl who has attention challenges, what makes following directions so difficult for her.She thought for a second, and enthusiastically responded, “My imagination!”
I could not have said it better!
Much to the chagrin of our loved ones, the imaginations of children (and adults) with attention challenges often get us off task when we are trying to follow-through on directions and daily tasks.
Fortunately, the parent who applies flexible structuring can improve his child or teen’s ability to follow instructions in nine easy steps. Continue reading to find out how.
Try these suggestions to improve your child’s ability to follow-through on directions.
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Don’t try to compete with the TV, iPod, X-box, etc. Turn them off first.
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Make sure you have your child’s attention before giving verbal instructions: Make direct eye contact and make sure she is looking at you.
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Make sure you mean what you say.
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State exactly what you need her to do in as few words as possible. Keep it brief and to the point.
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State directions clearly instead of asking a question. When asked, “Are you ready to clean up your room, sweetie?” many kids will respond, “No!”
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Have your child repeat what she is supposed to do: First, praise her for what she gets right! Then, correct any mistakes in a firm and matter of fact manner.
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Don’t say what you don’t want your child to do: say what you want him to do. Say, “Use your fork.” rather than “Don’t eat with your hands!”
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If your child is determined (strong-willed), reframe a negative statement into a positive. For example, instead of saying, “Don’t even think about playing until you have finished all your homework,” trying enthusiastically stating, “When you accurately finish your homework, let’s play a game!”
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Break multiple step instructions down into small steps based on what your child is able to do.
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When your child follows directions or is making a good attempt to follow instructions, give her much praise and positive feedback.
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If she is completing the task but doing so in a different way than you might, continue to cheer her on to finish the task. Don’t stop her to show her how you would do it, as this will only get her “off-task” from the task at hand. Praise her for completing the task. After she has successfully completed the task a few times, model how she could complete the task better.
After I finished talking with Michelle about how smart and talented she is, I told her that having a good imagination is actually a good thing when you’re a grown-up, especially if you are “in charge”: you can come up with lots of ideas and then you can have all the people you who work for you do those things you’ve imagined!
Need Help Applying this Concept?
Call 817.421.8780 to make an appointment.
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(c) 2010 -2015, Monte W. Davenport, Ph.D.
